Aside from all the recipes, places, and realizations that I post, the core of this blog would be the collaborative inspiration that I draw from people. There’s this force of ingenuity when a story transcends and wakes a part of your spirit especially when it is a story of strength in all levels and in all forms. When you click the Inspirations tab from the menu in my blog, I could confidently say that this a safe net and this place upholds a social responsibility to uplift women in all walks of life.
Compared to my immigrant housewife friends, I lead a pretty boring life. So, the next best thing to do out of boredom is to have a conversation with one of those who spurs my interest in this time of my life. So I did! This has been an exciting time for my friend, Regine. I’ve met Regine early this year when we were studying a short course in preparation for our Medical career here in Australia. I vividly remember the exact scene when I came into the classroom and asked her if she is a fellow filipino, because I was dying to at least have one friend nearly as a security blanket and a little of that cultural comfort zone, and sat beside her since then. Best thing followed through was when I’ve met four more friends and and during that tedious time in our lives, we drew strength from one another.
Regine was few weeks in her first trimester pregnancy, when we started the course. I personally became a witness of a miracle that unfold inside her as the 10 weeks course went by. I knew right there and then that I will be good friends with this woman as she exudes this fearless attitude that definitely piqued my gravity towards her when I was being ridden with discouragement. Before immigrating in Sydney, Australia, Regine is a practicing Pediatrician in the Philippines. She emigrated with her husband, Trevor who established a career in the IT field. Cliche and cheesy as it seemed, but they are the perfect example of first love never dies. They met and dated in college and due to circumstances, had separated, only to find each other again when Regine attended a friend’s wedding in Sydney. They reconnected and the rest made them a family that they are now.
1. Tell me how your journey started here in Australia?
January 2017, I came to Sydney for a high school friend’s wedding. I reconnected with my friend and first boyfriend during college. Since then, we took a second chance and braved a long distance relationship and eventually got engage on Oct 2017 at Hunter Valley. We decided to be married via civil rights in the same year and got married on in church in 2018.
2. How did you prepare and cope for a whole different life and your role as a full- time housewife?
There wasn’t any concrete preparation at all. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. Up to now I still have emotional moments especially when I miss my family and close friends. I was able to cope by changing my perspective. I saw the move as an opportunity for me to grow and mature. The first few days were about learning life skills such as cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry etc.
3. At what point in your stay in Australia have you known of your pregnancy?
I have known of my pregnancy few weeks during my permanent stay here in Australia. It was an exciting news for me and my husband because this is an uncharted adventure for us.
4. Since you are a first time mom, can you tell me about your pregnancy journey— what are the changes you noticed about yourself aside from physical changes and how you responded with the changes and/ or challenges you encountered?
My pregnancy was easy during the first 2 trimesters. During my third trimester, I had Gestational Diabetes Mellitus (GDM) and my baby was in a breech position. My GDM was diet controlled but it was still stressful just because I had to monitor and prick three times a day. By 36 weeks, my baby was still in a breech position. So by the time I was term, I was scheduled for external cephalic version which was eventually postponed since the baby’s neck was apposed to the cord. So my healthcare team decided to push through an Elective Caesarean section. However, labor pains occurred before the schedule and now I have to go to Emergency Caesarean section. Caesarean section during the procedure was a breezy one, although they had to monitor me tediously because it was a general operation but the challenge for me was the after procedure. It was hard to get up because of the pain of the operative wound. Breast feeding was also a challenge at first because the healing period for CS is longer, so it was hard to carry my baby right away. Assistance was definitely needed. Good thing that the program here includes breastfeeding coach that personally comes to the house to help and guide me with the proper technique. There was a big difference when as a pediatrician, I lecture about breast feeding to patient or mums, but when I was at the same position, it was a new and humbling experience. Also my midwife also visited me on post- partum period and monitored my progress. I am fortunate enough that I had a support system, both externally and from my own family My parents and in- laws came as well and made crucial contribution to raise this little family of ours.
5. What are your insights in this journey that you are right now?
Trust in the processs, trust in God that whatever or wherever life takes you there’s always a reason for it. The motherhood itself for me gave me sense of direction. Many would say that in motherhood, you will miss out a lot in life, but it actually enriched as a person and it gave me purpose. Motherhood will bring out something in yourself that you never thought you have. Take patience as an example, I thought before, I am already legitimately a patient person but I realized that my patience has been stretched over into many folds no matter how exhausting the routine may seem, it’s so rewarding for me to know that I am capable of unconditional love– that my heart swells of love, I think that’s a perfect description of it.
6. How are you coping with motherhood now? Tell me about your frustrating days and rewarding days and how you manage it?
It was a slow process. There wasn’t an instant gratification aside from the initial miracle of life that came out of me. It was sort of physically exhausting because of the routine and due to hormonal changes, it can push an emotional button. Eventually I get to notice and appreciate that my husband and I, our bond strengthened now we have an addition to the family. It strengthened our partnership in way that we didn’t have anyone else to depend on but ourselves and it brought out the best in both of us. It wasn’t only me who changed and gained insights but I also witnessed Trevor’s growth in this journey of Fatherhood and I genuinely appreciated him even better and I think my love has deepened even more as well. Also, when I get to witness my son’s little by little response to the world, those are rewarding enough for me as a mom. Also it isn’t so bad to take time for yourself even for couple of hours. Good thing I have a husband who encourages me even at least to get myself a pedicure or a pilates session just to pull me back and pace myself again.
7. What are your advice to people who might have similar situations as we have?
Take it one day at a time, I guess. you might not see even a foresight of the end point of your plans immediately, but trust in the process and pray for it everyday. Every step of the way and everything you do daily would lead you to where God wants you to be. There’s no sense in worrying about it now, because it might just be counter-productive. Appreciate what you have at the moment. Like for me, I am grateful that I have ample time to take care of my son, to witness his milestones and get to relish the bond that we have. I am also thankful for my husband who provides for us not only financially but gives mindful support for us emotionally. Even if we do not have much at least we thrive and that’s also a blessing. Do not overanalyze the things that you don’t have, like you are less of a person if you are not having a career for example, because other people might be wishing the exact opposite thing that you are looking for. Your decision to be happy is really up to you. But more often than not, that happiness is the same as contentment and it might just be closely surrounding you, you just have to count it as your blessing.
For me, Regine took the one of the hardest roads. While she might had an indefinite hiatus from a vocation that occupied most of her adult life and took a leap of faith to an unfamiliar zone, she totally gained so much from it. She has a doting husband, a healthy child, and she discovered more about herself. She definitely wouldn’t have it any other way.
Postscript: all pictures are raw data of motherhood and of cuteness overload.
The Housewife, MD 